Its been over a year since I wrote Scary Baby Buys and since then I've come across a few more products that make me laugh, gag, or shake my head in wonder - I hope you do the same. Enjoy!
1. The Snot Sucker
I love my children and will do anything to help them when they're sick, but I draw the line at sucking their snot out with a straw. Um, gross. Plus, I'm pretty sure no child is going to sit so serenely while something is shoved up his/her nose. The baby below is clearly drugged...that lady is stoned - her modeling career didn't exactly go as planned.
2. Sleep Sack
How old is this kid?? Twelve? What in the world is he still doing in a sleep sack??? If your kid can walk and is still in a sleep sack, you might have gone wrong somewhere in the sleep training process...maybe time to review and see if you missed a step.
3. Sucker Dust
Guess what this is? Give up? It's personalized fairy dust. Guess how much it cost? $68. Really....there are no words.
5. Birthing Gown
This isn't just an ugly maternity dress. It is a designer hospital gown. Yep, because you can't just give birth and bleed all over the gown that's provided - that would be be unsightly. For $60 you can bleed all over this one.
I got a catalog in the mail yesterday pedaling mismatched socks. I have to admit it took me a few minutes to figure it out...but the gist is this: You give them $16 - they give you three socks that don't match! Apparently there is a market for such a thing. Why is it that I always miss out on those million dollar ideas?
7. Probably My Mother's Day Present
I'm a breast-feeding advocate. I breast-fed all three of my children with varying degrees of success. However, this necklace is just every degree of wrong...
8. Baby Cadaver Pajamas
This is gross Old Navy! My son is made of frogs, snail and puppy dog tails - not grody organs. Who wants to see their sweet little baby laying in his crib with his internal organs drawn on the outside. I don't want to imagine my baby as a cadaver!
9. The Suggestive Baby Book
Jack got this book for Christmas, and I know it's supposed to be a finger puppet baby - but COME ON - that thing looks like a creepy penis. We don't really like wiggling this "baby" at our son.