Thursday, January 26, 2012

Curse you Sally Hansen

My Armerian genes have blessed me with thick dark hair that grows quickly. This blessing is not limited to the top of my head. It also grows all over my face. Left unmanaged, I have about a week before I resemble the late Osama bin Laden. 

My free time all seems to be spent plucking, waxing, and bleaching. 

As I've been grooming all of this hair for nearly 20 years, I've become pretty good at it. However, after I had children a few new stray hairs popped up for me to pluck - right on the end of my chin. What the hell? Really? Yes, Really. 

The chin hair is particuraly frustrating as it remains the most elusive and most difficult to capture. While I might not see a hair in the bathroom mirror, I can later glance in the rear view mirror and see a long one just dangling there - mocking me. 

Mock away lone chin hair - I've now stashed a pair of tweezers in the console. I'll pluck you dead. 

The hair on my upper lip (I refuse to call it a mustache) is mantained with a bleach/wax combo method. I've been bleaching for years without incident  - until yesterday. 

I mixed the Salley Hansen bleach, applied and began the 8 minutes until bleaching was completed. After a minute or two I knew something was wrong - it burned - really bad. I didn't want to take it off - I didn't have time to re-bleach - so I left it as long as I could stand it and then removed it. 

My skin was burned but worse - I looked like Ronald McDonald. My upper-lip hair was orange. Apparently if you don't leave bleach on long enough dark hair will, of course, will turn orange. I'll have to wait a few days before I can wax or re-bleach, my poor skin can't take it. 

I'll be in hiding for the next few days. Lucky Justin! He can hang out all weekend with me while I'm in seclusion looking like Osama bin ronald McDonald.

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