Friday, April 8, 2011

Saturday and Salty Meat

Justin wanted to go to the bar tonight. So today, to lessen his guilt - oh who am I kidding - to lessen the grief I’d give him, decided to take the girls out for the afternoon to give me a break. Of course, he wouldn’t take the baby. The baby would be staying with me. He’d be more likely to strap a nuclear bomb in the car seat than the baby. The bomb would be less intimidating.

I thought maybe he’d take the girls to buy me a Christmas present. I mean, come on, I grew a child and gave birth this year -  so I think I’ve got something good coming my way. Yet I’m thinking I better clear some cabinet space. I’m pretty sure I’ll find a cheap appliance from Wal-Mart wrapped for me under the tree. So much for the miracle of birth; If I’m lucky, it might get me a waffle iron.
Although there was laundry that needed to be done, presents that needed to wrapped, and probably a pet or two that needed to be fed, I decided that I’d lounge in bed and watch some tv with a snack. Alas, there wasn’t much to I settled for some pepperoni slices. And wouldn’t you know it, there wasn’t much on TV, so I watched a Zumba infomercial.  Really. This is how I spent my free time today - eating salty meat and watching infomercials. This bliss didn’t last long. After about thirty minutes, the baby, who had been sleeping, became fucking hysterical, and I had to abandon my pepperoni. But I’ll hang on to the memory of my real Christmas gift - thirty minutes to myself with a bag of pepperoni slices and Zumba. Repeat the Sounding Joy.

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